You look in the mirror while you’re getting ready for a hot date.

Futzing with your pants- you wonder, “Do I look fat?”

Fixing your hair-you worry, “Does my hair look okay?”

Your negative self-talk can be unending. Sigh.

Going on a date can be like one long job interview. But, obviously, you won’t get the job if you stress your weaknesses during the interview. The same applies to going on a date. While we all have our insecurities and weak spots, there’s no point focusing on them- especially if you want to be in a healthy relationship.

Confidence when dating is sexy and attractive.

Confidence reflects self-acceptance and self-love. Substituting negative thoughts with positive alternatives can be helpful: “I don’t like my outfit,” can be replaced with, “I am a beautiful person and I have so much to offer a relationship.” And, if you reassure yourself that you are beautiful, you will radiate beauty.

If you don’t have confidence, it will be difficult for you to be at ease with your date – or for your date to be at ease with you. To help deal with your insecurities, stop thinking about your limited view of yourself!

Focus on your date! Show genuine interest in what he has to say. Be honest-and courteous. Ask him questions. Listen to the answers – and ask more questions.

Whether you’re dating or in a relationship, feel good about yourself.

Just before you see him, tell yourself, “I’m calm, relaxed and confident.”

If you change your self-talk, you will show up different.

Reassure yourself and have a great time. The worst that happens is you learn more about yourself.